The Feared One gave me an iPhone so I can blog while I'm on my unholy mission. I would have preferred Android but whatever.
In order to get to the Pentagon I have to take the bus through several stops, each one more dangerous than the last. This city doesn't like proxies. It likes me even less because I'm a Blogger, even though I'm called noblogger.
Stop 1: The Timberwolf Cafe
Stop 2: Downtown
Stop 3: Subway Station
Stop 4: Runner Hospital
Stop 5: Grove Street
Stop 6: Blindman High
Stop 7: The Pentagon
I feel a little ill. I hope I don't bleed out on this bus. Oh god. Fhofpevor sbe zber pbqrf! Rl'yeh fhtagn... wish me luck, guys.
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
Proxy Post (64/96)
"hellonoblogger" the Feared One said.
"Yo how's my main man doing," I said.
"prettygoodyouknowhowitis.anywayyouareprobablywonderingwhyIcalledyouhere," he said.
"You want me to kill alliterator," I said. "I know this because there were rumours. But killing alliterator is impossible," I then said.
"iwantyoutokillalliterator," he said.
"But killing alliterator is impossible," I then said.
"trueunlessyouhavetheonlyweaponcapableofkillinghim," he growled.
"And what's that?" I sasked.
"themightypen," he said. "inordertoacquirethisunholysacrilegedeviceyouwillhavetotraveltotheveryoutskirtsofthecityandstealitfromthepentagon."
"You want me... to.... steal from the Pentagon?" I said, bewildered.
"itwon'tbeeasy,youknowthistobetrue.butthatiswhyientrustthistasktoyou,foryouaremyrighthandman." he said.
I laughed and said "You know it. Bros before hoes, am I right?"
He laughed this time and said "youaremyfavouriteproxyBilly."
I recoiled in angst from this name which was a dagger to my heart. "You hurt me. I don't go by that name anymore," I whispered.
"i'msorrybutifyouwanttotrulybenobloggeryouwillhavetodothis." He said.
"I'll manage. When do you want it done by?" I said.
"iwantitdonebyyesterdayyouknowthat.butyouarenotgoodenoughtohavedoneitbyyesterdayorelseyouwouldhavedoneitbynow." He said.
"Relax. I will do it, and it'll be done as soon as I can." I said. Then I turned and walked out.
"beforeyougothereisonemorething," he said.
"Make it quick," I said. I was planning on crashing with some proxy friends for the night.
"youmayhavetokillalltheSlendermenonyourjourney.alsodoesthenameMaskymeananythingtoyou?" he said.
".........." I said, not turning around.
"ithoughtnot.goodluck." he said. Then I walked out, trying to wrap my head around all of this.
"Yo how's my main man doing," I said.
"prettygoodyouknowhowitis.anywayyouareprobablywonderingwhyIcalledyouhere," he said.
"You want me to kill alliterator," I said. "I know this because there were rumours. But killing alliterator is impossible," I then said.
"iwantyoutokillalliterator," he said.
"But killing alliterator is impossible," I then said.
"trueunlessyouhavetheonlyweaponcapableofkillinghim," he growled.
"And what's that?" I sasked.
"themightypen," he said. "inordertoacquirethisunholysacrilegedeviceyouwillhavetotraveltotheveryoutskirtsofthecityandstealitfromthepentagon."
"You want me... to.... steal from the Pentagon?" I said, bewildered.
"itwon'tbeeasy,youknowthistobetrue.butthatiswhyientrustthistasktoyou,foryouaremyrighthandman." he said.
I laughed and said "You know it. Bros before hoes, am I right?"
He laughed this time and said "youaremyfavouriteproxyBilly."
I recoiled in angst from this name which was a dagger to my heart. "You hurt me. I don't go by that name anymore," I whispered.
"i'msorrybutifyouwanttotrulybenobloggeryouwillhavetodothis." He said.
"I'll manage. When do you want it done by?" I said.
"iwantitdonebyyesterdayyouknowthat.butyouarenotgoodenoughtohavedoneitbyyesterdayorelseyouwouldhavedoneitbynow." He said.
"Relax. I will do it, and it'll be done as soon as I can." I said. Then I turned and walked out.
"beforeyougothereisonemorething," he said.
"Make it quick," I said. I was planning on crashing with some proxy friends for the night.
"youmayhavetokillalltheSlendermenonyourjourney.alsodoesthenameMaskymeananythingtoyou?" he said.
".........." I said, not turning around.
"ithoughtnot.goodluck." he said. Then I walked out, trying to wrap my head around all of this.
Proxy Post (63/96)
The proxy apartment is subdivided into three floors: The top floor is the penthouse suite where all us cool proxies live, it has a hot tub, and a big closet full of guns. The middle floor is a lame place for the lame greenmasks, it's nothing but beds for each of them and they don't even get snack privileges until they've killed their first Runner. The bottom floor is the altar where we throw Runner prisoners and force them to worship the Feared One. It also has a reception for welcoming us when we get home, because the front door is there and also vending machines stocked with Masky Way bars. Sometimes we go on the roof and drink beer together.
It's not easy being a veteran proxy, having to drink the most beer and then expected to kill many Runners to fill a quota. I haven't killed any in a while, but it's cool because the Feared One and I are bros. He recently started talking about giving me a super big task, said to be impossible. I suspect he wants me to kill alliterator, because rumors have been going around. But alliterator can't be killed.
The Feared One is calling me to the altar now. brb
It's not easy being a veteran proxy, having to drink the most beer and then expected to kill many Runners to fill a quota. I haven't killed any in a while, but it's cool because the Feared One and I are bros. He recently started talking about giving me a super big task, said to be impossible. I suspect he wants me to kill alliterator, because rumors have been going around. But alliterator can't be killed.
The Feared One is calling me to the altar now. brb
Tuesday, October 20, 2015
Lamentations and Thoughts
Early on, the Feared One killed my girlfriend. She's dead now. I was upset, but if I showed it he would kill me too. So I perservered. And I prevailed.
Woe to the world, I said from the rooftops.
After killing her, the Feared One gave me a mask, but I tore it up, because I wear no mask. My identity is nothing at all. I am not just like the shadows, I am the shadows. And because of that all disguises are pointless. They just make it clear where I am, or where I am not. It's like the philosophy of Sartre. But with no mask, I was and am still the Feared One's proxy, and I needed a name, so I chose noblogger. It is the antithesis of my birth name, my rejection of society's customs and expectations, my middle finger to The Man. I will not be defined by The Man's standards, instead I will be the opposite of what it wants me to be.
As noblogger, my head keeps spinning, sometimes I have insane bouts and kill people. Luckily they are always people that the Feared One wants me to kill, so me and him are on good terms. But still sometimes I wonder, what purpose is man? Must I live and die on the internet? Verily, my name is Failure.
But then what does that make my readers?
Woe to the world, I said from the rooftops.
After killing her, the Feared One gave me a mask, but I tore it up, because I wear no mask. My identity is nothing at all. I am not just like the shadows, I am the shadows. And because of that all disguises are pointless. They just make it clear where I am, or where I am not. It's like the philosophy of Sartre. But with no mask, I was and am still the Feared One's proxy, and I needed a name, so I chose noblogger. It is the antithesis of my birth name, my rejection of society's customs and expectations, my middle finger to The Man. I will not be defined by The Man's standards, instead I will be the opposite of what it wants me to be.
As noblogger, my head keeps spinning, sometimes I have insane bouts and kill people. Luckily they are always people that the Feared One wants me to kill, so me and him are on good terms. But still sometimes I wonder, what purpose is man? Must I live and die on the internet? Verily, my name is Failure.
But then what does that make my readers?
Power
Hello, fellow readers. You may be relatively confused by this esoteric blog you are reading. Who is this intriguing personality, you're saying.
You may remember me as the name I once used:
I kill for the Feared One. I will kill each and every one of you readers, and then I will kill all of the Slendermen with my power, rising.
Power. It's what I represent now. It's what I resent now. I live in an abandoned apartment complex (complex like my soul) with other proxies who are not as powerful as me. The Feared One favours me, you see, and gave me all this...
...power.
(that's my theme song, by the way)
a psalm for the living dead kings
it has been.
far too long.
since i last.
heard you speak.
by which i.
mean since i.
last wrote here.
my criti.
cal retreat.
into the dark.
subconscious.
of the mind.
is complete.
behold my.
expert eyes.
radio.
means nothing.
once was man.
i, that is.
killed for fun.
now regret.
i'm complex.
enjoy my.
typing quirk.
i'm billy.
no longer.
reborn, I
AM NOBLOGGER.
I KILL FOR
THE FEARED ONE
NOW AND FOR
EVER NOW.
far too long.
since i last.
heard you speak.
by which i.
mean since i.
last wrote here.
my criti.
cal retreat.
into the dark.
subconscious.
of the mind.
is complete.
behold my.
expert eyes.
radio.
means nothing.
once was man.
i, that is.
killed for fun.
now regret.
i'm complex.
enjoy my.
typing quirk.
i'm billy.
no longer.
reborn, I
AM NOBLOGGER.
I KILL FOR
THE FEARED ONE
NOW AND FOR
EVER NOW.
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